Song Of The Day 10/16/2012: Alice Cooper - "Big Apple Dreamin' (Hippo)"

For reasons I am utterly unable to fathom, yesterday the New York Times started following my Twitter account. On the one hand, I'm flattered that the Grey Lady is paying my little attention-starved ticker any heed whatsoever. On the other hand, if they're following me, perhaps they should take this one step further and take me on as their correspondent. Their Seattle arts guy. Or their Master Of Pith. Or maybe I should start doing their Songs Of The Day. Listen, Jill Abramson, I know you're new there. We can easily work something out. Would you like someone to make you "hip" for the "new generation"? Let's "talk." I have "Skype."

Another way to interpret this is that print journalism is in really desperate straits. But you know me, glass half-full. Here's a song from Vincent Furnier that outlines just how far I'm willing to go with this. Hello, New York! Caviar? Sure! I'll have the Ossetra because I'm low maintenance! Throw the Beluga to the kids!