This is the second Song Of The Day this year that comes with a video depicting a woman beating people up in a barroom. The first one was Sallie Ford & The Sound Outside's "Party Kids" back in April. This one's by the Monsters, a garage band from Switzerland, which has great banks and a sometimes defensible, sometimes annoying tradition of political neutrality. In the Sallie Ford beat-people-up video there is an obvious provocation, as the bartender (Ford) is getting needled and sexually harassed by a gang of rogues. In the Monsters' "Blow" from 2011 a tattooed dancer wails on a guy (played by one in the band) who can't decide if he's a cowboy or a Shriner, who gets out of his seat and dances with her. Which is all fine and well, a little irritating maybe, perhaps a bit of an encroachment on her personal space, plus he's a lousy dancer. But she puts up with it until he starts using his beer bottle in an unsuitable way. Maybe that's okay in Switzerland, buddy, but over here where we all like to answer questions, we'll have none of that. Swiss Shriners always coming over here trying to steal our women with their double entendres and their stupid knives. And speaking of, why have I never come across a Swiss army knife where the corkscrew actually works? If I'm in the field with the rest of my patrol and we come upon some desperate situation in which we can only diffuse an incendiary device by quickly opening a bottle of 2007 Napa Valley Zinfandel I want a corkscrew that will do the job. This is a life and death situation here. Why is this not possible with you guys? Huh?
(This hacked-together passage of manufactured outrage was brought to you by Luminal. Now available in chewables.)
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