Song Of The Day 9/26/2014: Cos - "Boehme"

Canterbury Week:
Canterbury Board of Tourism

September 26, 2014 

Mr. Paul Pearson
Seattle, Washington USA
Via Fax

Dear Mr. Pearson,

On behalf of Canterburians of legend and the present, we thank you for your efforts to arouse interest in the progressive rock and roll movement based in our modest hamlet four decades ago, and hope you comprehend with utmost sobriety our request that you cease doing so immediately.

Although the spirit of your activity is well-met and even encouraged in certain outskirts of our city -- primarily those without adequate irrigation or access to electrical power -- local authorities, whose discretion and evaluation we trust with all implicit respect, feel that a line must be drawn. 

Again, this decision from the guardians of our municipality does not reflect any ill sentiments towards your enthusiasm, third-hand may it be, for Canterbury and its artistic heritage -- far from it. Nevertheless, we do not believe the manifestations of said enthusiasm as it pertains to the upkeep of local landmarks and historic sites within Canterbury serve the greater good or reinforce our scrupulously maintained civic well-being.

In addition to calling a halt to your admittedly heartfelt weblog tribute, we also ask you or your designates to remove these articles (or, as your spokesman so eagerly euphemised, "installations") from the public spaces in and around Canterbury in brief order:

- The tapestry draped across the front of The Westgate featuring a portrait of American singing star Kenneth Chesney with the caption "CANTERBURY: FIND YOUR BEACH -- CORONA LITE";

- The "monster truck course" which was made by moving rocks in the ruins of St. Augustine's Abbey;

- The 50-foot inflatable figurine of American football star Richard Sherman dressed as our Archbishop at the Kent County Cricket Club;

- The "Fotomat" kiosks which presently dot the perimeter of the Canterbury city walls;

- The advertisements for the prayerfully fictional motion picture Jeff Chaucer P.I.: A Hundred Years' Smackdown

- The 150 Vintage Spartus wood grain digital alarm clocks (c. 1984) left in the seats at the Marlowe Theatre; and

- The "keytars" left in the organ well at the Cathedral.

We assume your extraction of these items with due haste shall not suffer your expenses in effort or finances. Also, please return the Cathedral pipe organs, as Saturday is Disco Throwback Night at the Community Center.

We also appreciate your kindness in never returning here.


Rowan Atkinson

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