The Top Songs Of The Day of 2014: #30-21

For this year's countdown of the Top 30 Songs Of The Day for 2014 I had to apply some calculations. Since I'm using cumulative data for pageviews, in the past the top songs of the year weighted heavily towards songs that showed up closer to the earlier part of the year. So I came up with some formula that simulates how truly popular each song might be were it on the blog for the whole year. I've forgotten what the calculation was. I'm a little frightened to go back into my Excel notes to see what it was. I'm kind of sure it would make statisticians across the world gasp in horror. But it's all we got. I don't have a Nate Silver on the staff. I don't even have a Long Dong Silver on the staff. It's just me and my calculus-resistant mind. But I think, whatever the numbers were, this is a pretty good list. Deal. Here we go.

30. The Books - "A Cold Freezin' Night"
Nov. 23



A copy-and-paste electronic composition featuring found snippets from children using an audio recorder with Home Alone 2 branding. If that doesn't fit my demo I'm going to get a crowbar and force my demo to fit it.

29. Tom Watt - "Subterranean Homesick Blues"
Feb. 9



I found out afterwards that this synth-heavy reworking of Dylan's hit from a British actor featured members of New Order. None have yet admitted it.



28. Iggy Pop - "The Tell-Tale Heart"
Oct. 30



The scariest spoken word performance Iggy's given since the entire Avenue B album.



27. Joe Pesci - "Got to Get You Into My Life"
Aug. 16



When you open Tommy DeVito's shinebox, this is what comes out. Then like the climax of Raiders of the Lost Ark it flies around the room and anybody who hasn't put their hands over their ears gets their face melted off.



26. Jill Read - "Maybe"
Aug. 22



A scintillating recording of the old R&B standard, enlivened by the possibility that this was actually Dave Edmunds with extensive pitch control technology applied. And this was the '70s!



25. Peter Ustinov - "Mock Mozart" + "Phoney Folklore"
Aug. 3



"Mock Mozart" was not so much a comedy recording as a wacky experimental vocal piece, with Anthony Hopkins helping out somewhere. I don't remember what the hook of "Phoney Folklore" was. Gee, you guys have good taste. This was the first production of one George Martin.



24. The Wheels - "Road Block"
Nov. 29



A pretty daring track from the explosive Belfast '60s group that wasn't Them.



23. Neil Diamond - "The Pot Smoker's Song" vs. Sonny Bono - "Pammie's on a Bummer"
Nov. 4


Nobody voted for winners like they were supposed to, but November's Song Wars! series had three separate face-offs landing in this year's Top 30. Diamond and Bono went toe-to-toe trying to talk kids out of smoking the marijuana. Results were mixed.



22. Ame Son - "Hein, Quant a Toi"
Dec. 2



French progressive rock. Sometimes I program this blog using Mad Libs.



21. Sen. Sam Ervin (D-N. Carolina) - "Bridge Over Troubled Water"
May 17



During a year when we were treated anew to archival recordings of Lyndon Johnson giving detailed instructions about his underwear to an unknown tailor, it was nice to hear a slightly more sentimental, if equally awkward, reminiscence from a '60s Southern Democrat.